Hey, wasn't I a big shot at one point?

Since I was unceremoniously booted to the curb by MaxMedia (and do they occasionally have a ceremony for these sorts of things? If so, I'd still be open to a ceremony. I mean, I love parties.) I've noticed that I have lost all of my friends. I don't have a single friend left. It's almost like all the friends I had no longer find me interesting, charming, funny nor dashing. Which, if you know me, is impossible.
If I were a cynical sort I'd posit that the only reason my old friends wanted to hangout with me was because I was on the radio and they wanted their band on the air. Or, in a very specific case, they only hung out with me because I could (and did) give them a radio show on Indie 101.5.
There's one local band in particular who were my pals, my buddies, hell, they'd even put me on the guest list when they played a $5 dollar cover show. I had some sway with these guys, they liked me. Oddly, that washed up a week after I was, again without a ceremony nor even a gathering with alcohol, fired by the neat radio company.
What I'm getting at here peoples is that I'm fine with getting fired from jobs and therefore being friendless. All I want from these people that are ridding me from their person hood like I'm a pubic louse, is a ceremony. And it has to involve alcohol. You can all dump me. I accept that. But can't we do it "ceremoniously?"